Become Emotionally Empowered
What is Emotional Empowerment?
Emotional vulnerability is reflected in stormy, shallow, deteriorating or unsatisfying and destructive relationships.
Dr Pieter van Jaarsveld wrote in his book (“Hart van ‘n wenner: ontwikkel jou EI”) that people who mostly live with negative emotions, become physiologically sick.
Research has shown that harboring constant emotions of worry and anger for only 5 minutes, can have a negative effect on our immune system for 6 hours. We thus do not only suffer emotionally from feeling vulnerable, but our physical health is also affected by it. It is necessary to have satisfying and meaningful relationships – with ourselves, our fellowmen and society on the whole to be fully functional and content.
Naturally we want to ensure we have continuous healthy relationships but where and how do we start?
To become emotionally empowered, the following 5 skills are need to be developed and enhanced :-
1. Self-awareness
Daniel Goleman says that people with high self-awareness are “aware of their moods as they are having them”. To increase self-awareness, we need to practice focusing on the present moment and label the feeling we are experiencing as accurately as we can.
Plato said that the life which is unexamined, is not worth living. We need to examine our strengths and weaknesses. It is necessary to get regular feedback from our boss, trusted colleagues, friends and family about the way you dealt with specific situations and get their opinion on ways to improve. We thus ‘learn who we really are and then live with that decision’. (Eleanor Roosevelt)
2. Self-regulation
Self-regulation is about staying in control of ourselves. To lose our temper; to be overwhelmed by emotions or to be on an emotional see-saw ride, make us vulnerable.
There are various techniques available to manage our emotions. To manage anger, we can “press pause” and give ourselves time-out to think about why we lost control and focus on the specific triggers we are sensitive to. Breathing techniques and admitting the anger, also help to gain control back. To be angry is OK, but it is how we deal with it; how we express it, that shows the level of our self-regulation.
3. Motivation
Anthony Robbins claims that only 2 forces determine our motivation to change: the avoidance of pain and the pursuit of pleasure. If we choose to lose 2 kilograms in a month’s time, it will certainly bring pleasure – how esteemed we feel fitting into a smaller size! We will therefore see the cake in front of us as pain – to eat it, will take us away from the pleasure of having a smaller waist line. If we are unmotivated to lose weight, the cake will be a source of pleasure.
Motivation levels can be boosted by:
- Developing self-discipline
- Looking for and celebrating small wins
- Staying focused on our short, medium and long term goals
Motivation also implies maintaining a positive attitude. We need to protect our energy by refraining from falling into the habit of complaining or to entertain listening to those who complain and suck energy out of us.
4. Empathy
Empathy is the ability to recognize other people’s emotions and to understand their perspective. Daniel Goleman calls this a “fundamental people skill”. We can develop our empathy by using listening skills. Don’t judge another until you have walked a mile in his shoes! Furthermore, focus on the other person during a conversation. It is not always about us! The spin-off from such an altruistic approach is that it will ensure that people would want to be in our company, an antidote to loneliness.
5. Social skills
Getting along well with people doesn’t mean that we must always be ‘nice’. We need to decide whether we want to be liked or to be respected. When we have the privilege of being liked and respected, we certainly have a friendship! Building trust and developing rapport with others are skills that can be developed.
If you would like to talk, feel free to reach out to us. An LifeWorks therapist would be able to help.
Dr. Naeema Ali trained psychology and social worker students of UAE University. She is actively providing counselling support to cancer patients and their families. She launched an occupational therapy for cancer patients and cognitive behavioural therapy in Tawam.
Due to her continued support in oncology and ongoing support to cancer patients, Naeema received countless awards locally and international to recognize her achievements and skills. She has been invited to participate in various conferences and workshops around the world and invited as a guest speaker in various subjects that covers psychology.
She also joined Al Sayegh Medical Center as a Social Worker, providing comprehensive assessment and treatment services to children and families, in inpatient and/or outpatient settings, and communicates with referral sources as indicated by applying psychometric test, such as IQ Test, MMPI, Wechsler Test for children. Exhibit superior communication skills to uncover complicated mental health issues; develop and recommend treatment plans based on patient needs and diagnosis.
She continued working as a clinical psychologist providing counselling within the multi-cultural environment of the Emirates Airlines for the past 15 years. Her main task is providing mental health support to inflight and ground staff and addresses any problems, anxieties, or job-related stresses that they are dealing with. She uses her findings to help improve processes and behaviors of a patient to maintain a safe environment, to manage stress, overcome trauma, or avoid job-related conflicts. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is the method Naeema is using to reduce the difficulties, anxieties, and stress that employee faces.
Naeema is also part of “ Shawer ”, the “Seek Our Advice”, and “We Listen To You” program of the Family Development Foundation of Abu Dhabi. The aim of the program was to promote family awareness and support a stable family life. It involves a group of community members who deal with family problems in a positive manner and provide individual and group counseling in social, psychological, and educational areas. They do so in a systematic way according to the needs of community members.
Besides “ Shawer ”, Naeema is also a volunteer of “ Friends of Cancer ” of Sharjah, supporting patients and their families to overcome the multitude psychological difficulties that they are experiencing due to cancer treatment as well as introducing some programs such as health education, self-care and some community programs wherein they can collaborate and share their experiences.
Area of interest:
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Psycho-oncology
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CBT
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Psychometric Assessments
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Children, Adults and Family therapy
Qualification and Membership:
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Psychology graduation from the University of Wisconsin
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Licensed by Community Development Authority
Dr. Mohammed Bardi M.B.B.S, M.D (Psychiatry) has worked under different capacities in clinical and hospital setups in Saudi, USA, and UAE. He comes with over 15 years of experience in mental health. He specifically worked with cases relating to schizophrenic, bipolar disorder, dual diagnosis, major depressive disorder with suicidal risks, anxiety disorders, Intellectual disabilities, Autistic spectrum disorders and attention deficit hyperactivity disorders (ADHD).
Area of interest:
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Mood disorders
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Anxiety disorders
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Improving life skills (social skills, self- esteem, decision making, coping with stress, problem solving, and time management)
Qualification and Membership:
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MBBS COLLEAGUE OF MEDICINE, KING SAUD UNIVERSITY 2003 (KKU).
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ARAB BOARD OF MEDICAL SPECIALTIES IN PSYCHIATRY 2007
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ANXIETY DISORDERS WORKSHOP (DIPLOMA), 2010
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ADDICTION FELLOWSHIP UCLA, USA, 2010-2011
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ADDICTION RESEARCH AND MATRIX TRAINING, ISAP, UCLA, LOS ANGELES, CA, USA 2014-2015
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BACHELOR’S DEGREE OF MEDICINE AND SURGERY
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ARAB BOARD OF MEDICAL SPECIALTIES IN PSYCHIATRY
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ADDICTION FELLOWSHIP UCLA 2011, 2015
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BETTY FORD CERTIFICATE, ADDICTION PROGRAM 2010
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CDA) Licensed Psychologist
Therapeutic Approach:
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At LifeWorks Holistic Counselling Center Dubai, Dr. Bardi works collaboratively within our expert multidisciplinary team, in treating a wide array of psychiatric conditions including:
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Anxiety disorders
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Substance use disorders
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Mood disorders including depression and Bipolar affective disorders
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Psychotic disorders (Schizophrenia and other psychotic disorders)
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Personality disorders
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Cognitive disorders including Dementia
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Learning disabilities (intellectual disability disorders)
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Child and adolescents’ disorders like Separation anxiety disorders, conduct
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disorders and ADHD